Sorry about the convoluted title...but I couldn't think of a good way to express what I'm going to write. So what I've noticed is that how I feel about myself influences if I accept what other people think of me. When I have let myself down and have a loss of self-respect, or am just feeling bad about myself, I am not open to accepting love from others. I think that if Mr. Right came around, I would probably not be in a state of mind to be able to receive his feelings for me, because they don't mirror my own. I wouldn't feel like I could trust them, or that what he thinks of me is valid.
It's an interesting concept, isn't it? I have started to realize that I am probably not alone in this, although many people probably are not aware of it. It's a humbling thing to think that you are in such a state. And I'm not in it always; I'm not like that. I've just come to realize that sometimes I am more loving of others than I am of myself, and consequently I am not as open to receiving love. This topic was brought to my mind, because in talking to a friend, the thought came to me that he might be experiencing this. I suggested that possibility to him, and he thought that probably was the case.
I wonder how often this happens, that we close ourselves off from the possibility of mutual love? It probably happens when we are trying to do things on our own, and it doesn't work, and all we see is that we don't measure up. We make efforts that fail, and we keep on trying the same things, when what we need to do is stop, ponder, and pray. Work with the Lord. Repent of our sins, and pray to be able to see ourselves (and others) as He sees us. Make the Lord a partner in the creation of our lives, in our daily lives. Each choice we make is creating our lives, and we choose how it will be. The atonement of Christ is key in being able to heal, and move on, and improve--enabling us to love ourselves and be open to receive their love as well.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Monday, December 3, 2007
Prayer
I was having a writing conference with this girl who is Muslim, planning out her doctrinal paper for Rel 100 a few days ago. We were talking about things she could compare between the two religions, and I mentioned that she could discuss prayer. "But Mormons don't pray," she said. I told her that we do pray, and I explained several things about prayer. She had never seen her roommates pray, so she didn't think that we did.
I've been learning a lot of things about prayer this semester, actually. I'm starting to become accountable for the things I have heard about prayer. Sometimes it seems like God is responsive to any half-hearted effort you make to be close to Him, but then you get to the point where you have to step it up. I think I came to one of those points this semester in the area of prayer.
Before, I could just think briefly about my day and what I'd pray for, then begin. I'd heard that it was a good idea to write out what you want to say, but I'd only done it a time or two. Then a few weeks ago, I realized that my prayers weren't focused, and that having my mind wander in the middle of the prayer was disrespectful and not effective. I remembered the idea about writing things down before praying, and that has helped a lot! I think more about what I want to say and I think a little more about who it is I'm talking to.
I've also realized the importance of writing down impressions after praying. When I stay on my knees for a few moments after praying, I occasionally have a thought or impression come to my mind. I've noticed that if I take the time to write that impression down, I have more details to write. The thought expands, and I come to new understanding.
Maybe what this boils down to is having respect for sacred things, and showing that you're wanting to receive revelation. Writing beforehand shows that you have a high regard for prayer as a vehicle and for God and his relationship to you. Writing afterward shows that you value receiving revelation and want to remember/act upon it.
And why do we pray, anyway? It's for us. Prayer benefits me much more than it benefits Heavenly Father. It is a way for me to stop and consider what His will is for me, and to strive to have that be the same as my will. It helps me to consciously think about being partners with God in making my life a success. It helps me to lose my life so that I can find it.
When I do the things I've learned, I reach a higher level of progression. When I don't, well, it isn't very fulfilling, and it usually leads to falling short of other expectations I have for myself. Have you ever noticed things like this in your life?
I've been learning a lot of things about prayer this semester, actually. I'm starting to become accountable for the things I have heard about prayer. Sometimes it seems like God is responsive to any half-hearted effort you make to be close to Him, but then you get to the point where you have to step it up. I think I came to one of those points this semester in the area of prayer.
Before, I could just think briefly about my day and what I'd pray for, then begin. I'd heard that it was a good idea to write out what you want to say, but I'd only done it a time or two. Then a few weeks ago, I realized that my prayers weren't focused, and that having my mind wander in the middle of the prayer was disrespectful and not effective. I remembered the idea about writing things down before praying, and that has helped a lot! I think more about what I want to say and I think a little more about who it is I'm talking to.
I've also realized the importance of writing down impressions after praying. When I stay on my knees for a few moments after praying, I occasionally have a thought or impression come to my mind. I've noticed that if I take the time to write that impression down, I have more details to write. The thought expands, and I come to new understanding.
Maybe what this boils down to is having respect for sacred things, and showing that you're wanting to receive revelation. Writing beforehand shows that you have a high regard for prayer as a vehicle and for God and his relationship to you. Writing afterward shows that you value receiving revelation and want to remember/act upon it.
And why do we pray, anyway? It's for us. Prayer benefits me much more than it benefits Heavenly Father. It is a way for me to stop and consider what His will is for me, and to strive to have that be the same as my will. It helps me to consciously think about being partners with God in making my life a success. It helps me to lose my life so that I can find it.
When I do the things I've learned, I reach a higher level of progression. When I don't, well, it isn't very fulfilling, and it usually leads to falling short of other expectations I have for myself. Have you ever noticed things like this in your life?
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